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A little foolish

Maybe I’m foolish for still feeling my heart sink a little when I see old pictures of us. I know it’s been months and I’ve finally moved on and let go of our failed fairytale, but I still find it hard to go and delete all those pictures off my social media.

This new guy is amazing and I know even you’d think he’s a great guy, but in certain aspects he will never be you, he will never know what it’s like to hold me while telling me his body is slowly shutting down. He will never push me away because his past will never disappear.

You were wonderful and I’ll always have a small place for you in my heart, but I cannot have you in my future.

So yes maybe I am foolish for feeling sad over pictures, but my heart is finally mended and able to love again.

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What do you gain?

Why do guys now a day, gain from telling a girl who they don’t know at all that they have a nice rack?

Do you really believe that’s something all girls like to hear? How would you feel if some random dude was telling your mom, or sister or even your future daughter the same thing. Would you be mad? Would you get up your seat to go teach that boy some respect towards women?

Don’t be that guy who makes women feel like they’re nothing more than a walking sexual object. We are more than just a pair of boobs, more than a big butt, and more than just something that get your blood pumping. We are the women who will help you reach your goals, who will one day carry your child.

So please quit making us just a sexual object that you like to stalk from time to time on social media. Be part of the generation that teaches girls that they are worth so much more than just a few nice words here and there from guys. Give those girls the value that they deserve.

Pray for Houston

With all the recent events that have pop up in social media this country has been divided into many sections.

Yet once Harvey hit all of Texas came together, we out our differences aside to help one another.

Please help us in any way possible, pray for this city to recover fast and for this to be a lesson to the country on how we should all work together for the better

Is it wrong?

Does it make you a doubtful person to look back at your boyfriends message from before y’all started dating and see how he was with other girls?

I know it really shouldn’t matter, but as I sit here in bed wishing I hadn’t looked at his phone I can’t help but feel scared yet again.

A Final Goodbye

Saying goodbye to the things we don’t want to let go off in life can be one of the hardest choices we have to make, but sometimes holding on to those things or those people can be more hurful than they can be loving.

I loved the time we had together and ill forever cherish the memories that we had the opportunity to create with one another, but moving on is the best thing for us to do.  I wish you nothing but the best in life and i hope that you can find someone to love you more than i was able to give you.

 

August

Anyone who has ever wanted to loose weight, or just feel better about themselves knows that we all hit bumbs down the road in where we find slim to none motivation or there seems to be no time available to hit the gym.

Although i keep reminding myself that im still young, I also try to remember that if I start healthy habits now its easier to keep going down the road. Those small changes that we give a bigger focus to when we’re younger have a greater pay out in the long run of the years.

Being a 22 year old in todays society, theres a lot of pressure to be “Fit” or to be close enough to fit the definitoin of what people think is attractive, and sadly no one will avtually fit those definitions without loosing sight of who they were before they listened to the opinions of others.  As much as im trying not to loose sight of why i started this fitness journey, i do find it hard to make myself wake up in the mornings, or drink water rather than drinks with sugar in it. Its so easy to forget that we cannot expect to loose the weight in one day when it certainly didn’t take us a day to gain them either.

Do not loose Hope, Do not hate yourself because you ate that cookie or because ypu skipped a workout, but DO remind yourself that you started this for yourself and not for society or this world

I am my own worst thoughts

My own thoughts about why things between us can’t be fixed keep me up at night, I find myself looking at my phone every few seconds hoping that maybe you’ll stop playing this game and choose to be with me once again.

We made this deal to just be friends, but can someone actually stay just friends with someone they once loved and still love? some day will I be able to look at you and not want to kiss you or look at you like some love strucked teen?

How I wish i could just rip you out of my heart and out of my thoughts.

I am my own worst enemy

I’m sure i’m not the only one who can relate to the title on my blog today, but has anyone ever wondered  why we’re like that?

Why do we always bring ourselves down in the most harsh ways possible?

Why do we think we’re not good enough to deserve better?

It could be that we feel that we don’t deserve more than what we already have due to the fact that no one likes it when people think they’re better than everyone else. In my own opinion i hate to wonder of what others might think of how i am as a person. Am i mean? Do i seem like a selfish person? Have i ever inspired others to want to be a better person? or to motivate them to better their own life?

Call me crazy 

Call me crazy if you want, even dumb and delusional for still getting butterflies in my stomach when I think of you. We may just be nothing more than friends for right now.. But I guess still being able to get a few good morning texts from you every now again gives me a little bit of hope to us still possibly having a future together. 

I love you yesterday, I love you today, and I’ll still love you tomorrow as much as I will 10 years down the road.. I just hope that it’s you besides me through all of that time. 

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